ECLIPSED AND OVERWHELMED !

Aaah ! It is Chandra Grahanam tonight announced a beaming Saroja as she went about her morning chores in mundane routine fashion.Aah ! Routine…let me think….that’s for Ma in law to muse upon murmured an amused Nayaki as she was drawing the daily kolam in the puja room.

Much though I would like to think and firmly believe that routine in moderation is only good,some whom I interact with on a daily basis are sticklers for rules and follow a strict routine every day without deviation, that sometimes leads me to try to believe that Strict Routine is indeed the mantra for a disciplined and a long healthy life." No way." I tell myself.The sticklers for routine are the senior citizens…my father in law Mahalingam and father Subramanian both octagenarians and my mother Vijaya and mother in law Saroja both septuagenarians…

While one couple had set home in the early 1950s in Tanjore near the Cauvery,another couple raised their children within the boundaries of an urban jungle near the banks of the Bhagirathi Hooghly.Each one to his own art of living  I guess and as a friend remarked each individual is indeed wired differently.Each individual is unique but with advancing years, the similar behaviour in almost all aspects,of the four highly revered and respected elders is truly baffling .

If I was able to dance ,sing,draw,paint,stitch, study and play in the good old days I owe all my abilities to my parents and if I am a career woman today,if I still get the space I need for my recreation ,if today I have the liberty to laze or relax as I please,and if I have the freedom to rant and blog ,I must thank the other two pillars who came into my life when I was 23 years old and completed the foundation work laid by my parents .The four of them have been instrumental in bringing out the best in me,and without the constant support and encouragement of whom I would not have been what I am today.They allow me to be as I please and they maintain routine for me..In return I try to do my bit…

 I still maintain that routine in moderation is good ,to prioritise is more important than carrying out mundane chores routinely.As I was getting ready for work today morning ,I pondered…"Over the years,why have I not adhered to a routine ?" To cite innumerable reasons,please note “reasons” and not “excuses “ is topmost on my mind now.I feel an irresistible urge to justify my actions… that’s all..

Perhaps with four pillars around me,I have never been forced to be committed, in the sense that mundane responsibilities were never thrust upon me. That in turn gave me the necessary space to do what I thoroughly enjoy and also to think out of the box once in a way.

"Have I failed in discharging my duties ? "my conscience prods me.As I look at the past excepting for my own personal academic excellence which I did aim for once upon a time and personal career upgradations which I willingly let go to take care of home and family, I have fared reasonably OK on the home and the work front.As I look at the present ,though my rise has been slow I am stable and contended.Should I take the credit ?. Maybe Not !!!!!!!

With an avalance of thoughts in my mind,the mind still refusing to accept the principle of following a  routine come what may for a disciplined life I ponder again…I have never been able to stick to a particular routine.I firmly believe that transfer of blame is a sign of weakness.As I ponder over the reasons for not being able to adhere to routine,I will not blame others but I have to thank many who have helped me to achieve the much needed stability in my life inspite of straying away from routine..

Growing up in a joint family has its advantages and I am thankful for the lessons it taught me early in my life.We learnt to adjust and share.We were taught to go to bed early and rise early.That was routine,though we were allowed to break free from routine during holidays.Grandmother was a stickler for routine and the designated duties for the rest of the family members just got easier.While she maintained time and a routine,the others chipped in to help,thus maintaining the rhythm of her routine.

She would not be happy to deviate from her rigid routine and the others were only too happy to keep her happy.She followed a strict code of conduct for herself,only expected us to do our bit and as much as we could do willingly with a smile on our face.She followed a routine ,the others simply followed her and in the process a systematic work pattern akin to an efficiently functioning assembly line fell in place.It was then impossible for any one of us to get off track.She caught us young and in the process we cultivated good practices that became habits for life.

While she ensured that her routine never went haywire, she was willingly sacrificing many of her own interests.A contended  Kannamani had laid the basis for the stable growth of the family as a whole .Clearly she had taken upon herself the responsibility of also ensuring that all her family members got to do what they wanted. She was fostering in each one of us the urge to explore the unexplored and kindling desires to create and innovate.

While she stuck to her routine,time and her targets,the rest had the flexibility to contribute their bit and continue with their interests.It was ofcourse expected that each one of us would discharge our personal duties and responsibilities without having to be reminded.

A Kannamani and a Krishnamoorthy in Kolkata as shining beacons  set an example for Subramanian and Vijaya who emulated their practices.A Saradambal and a Ramachandran in Thirividaimaruthur were doing the same and they passed on the family secret to Mahalingam and Saroja…….

Are Nayaki and her Nayak empowered too ? As guilt seems to overpower a sleepyhead Nayaki,she can be heard whispering…."Can you please pour some hot water into the coffee filter before you go to bed ?"…She was only delegating…….