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WHO COINS THEM ?

This post is purely a fragment of my imagination ! Quite like Unreal News.Com   ! Note that the countries come in alphabetical order !...

Friday, March 13, 2015

WON'T GIVE IT BACK !

ऑकलॅंड मे है उत्सव का माहौल ! 

बडिया होता अगर, वर्ल्ड कप आयोजित होता हर साल ! 


आज, फिर से, बल्ले को होने लगा है गेंद से प्यार !


बल्लेबाज़ ने खींच के मारा गेंद को सीमा के पार !


बड़ा ज़बरदस्त है, ज़िंबाब्वे गेंदबाज़ों की चाल,



शमी और यादव का भी बुरा नहीं है हाल !


आज चटारे की तेज़ की रफ़्तार है कुछ धीमी,


आखिर मुक़ाबले मे दलों ने अपनाई है कैसी रणनीति ?


ज़िंबाब्वे की फीलडिंग तो है बेहतेरीन ! 


स्टेडियम है नीलभरा और हराभरा है ज़मीन !


रोक नहीं सकता कोई फ़ॉर्म मे जब हो कोहली !


शायद वो सोचे कब लाऊँगा अनुष्का की डोली !


जब वापस नहीं है करना तो फिर कैसे बहाने ? 


नज़र मेरी लग गयी, रन आउट हो गये अजिंकय रहाने !


कौन खेलेगा आज भारत के तरफ से एक बड़ी बारी ?


कौन दिखायेगा अदा अपना ? तो फिर जीतना रहे जारी ! 


बैठी हूँ, निपटा के, घर का सारा काज काम,


धोनी, रैना या टेलर, दिन होगा आज किसके नाम ?


Tuesday, March 10, 2015

AN ODE TO A WOMAN !

Resilient in strength and character,

resolute and steadfast in thought,

brimming with confidence, she announces,

"None is equal to me."

Committed to the creator's order,

at peace with herself and her God,

Selflessly she serves and proclaims,

"None is equal to me."

To live a life of purpose,

is her cherished dream.

"I am the light that shows the way," she says,

"None is equal to me."

Endowed with multitude of skills,

logic and decisiveness is her forte,

thinking rationally she declares,

"None is equal to me."

I have the power to create,

to nurture, transform and embolden,

Endowed with intuitive skills, solemnly she speaks,

"None is equal to me."

Undeterred by disappointments,

she is too strong to be broken,

"I will keep inspiring," she says,

"None is equal to me."

Stare at her in awe !

Wonder where she got all that grit from !

"That is courage running in my blood," she reveals,

"None is equal to me."

"I revere my acts and my expressions,

I accept love and I stand for modesty,

Challenges make me stronger," she says,

“None is equal to me.”

"I am remarkable," so they say,

"I am witty, smart and charming too,"

"My smile conceals my tears," she says,

"None is equal to me."

Saturday, March 7, 2015

STYLE - HAVE PLAYERS BECOME MORE FASHION CONSCIOUS ?

Owing it's popularity to patronage by the great cricketing nations of the world, indebted to a sub continent where the game since inception, has been considered as religion and cricketers looked upon as Gods, it is but natural that inspite of controversies that keeping rearing their ugly heads now and then, the Gentleman’s game continues to evince keen interest amongst people of all ages even today. 

Awarded celebrity status for not only being outstanding sportsmen, who play for the honour and prestige of their respective countries, but also for being influential brand ambassadors, cricketers have come a long way and have evolved from being just sporting idols to style icons. Games that gentleman play today is all about big bashes, big entertainments, big values and the latest fashion trends.

He steps out in style waving to the crowds. The flamboyant opener walks with confidence, with one hand  on  the handle of the willow, with a firm grip on the lower end of the bat, he stretches out his arms, takes a few warm up steps,  jumps a little, bends his body sideways, first left, then right, looks up towards the skies and prays for divine intervention. This is just one such act on the field that is enough to send crazy fans into a frenzy or one could cite the presence of the dashing cricketer on the boundary line, the tall six footer who leaps upwards with an arm stretched out to hold on to a priceless catch or who falls flat to save the fours even as female fans swoon in the stands.These acts have been there for long now and as long as cricket continues to be played, such acts will be replayed again and again much to the delight of the fans. 

So what's new ? The handlebar moustache is in with the likes of openers like Shikar Dhawan and bowlers like Ravindra Jadeja sporting it for sometime now. So now we can expect the opener to walk into the ground twirling his moustache and twirling it again when he scores a ton.The bowler will get his chance too. All he needs is a couple of wickets and a few maiden overs. Swirling the ball, twirling his moustache, on completing his quota of overs he will walk to the deep with a smile on his face.

Does being an all rounder help in gaining an entry into the national team today? Oh! Yes, it does. Today's fashion savvy cricketer dons different roles on the field as and when the situations demand and off field takes on the bigwigs of the modelling world. He plays under pressure, looks good always and when he is not at the nets or playing for his country you could spot him either at a school for acting taking a few tips on how to walk the ramp and look suave on the silver screen. 

Many years back, when there were no endorsements, fashion was not in the minds of the players though we know of cricketers of yester years who are still talked about today for their dashing image, good looks and charisma. In the absence of commercialisation, the onus was only on performance and not on fashion. There were neither investors nor sponsors seeking to derive mileage from the game or from the cricketers. Hence the players were not fashion driven.

As I write this blog, funny thoughts crop up in my mind.What if we had a pot bellied Prasanna around today ? He would be rejected outright despite being capable of bowling vicious offbreaks whereas the less talented but fashion conscious Jadeja would make it to the team and in the process also bag a few modelling assignments. How about the specially abled B.S.Chandrasekar, a leg spinner par excellence, a genius who could confound the best batsmen. In his heydays when Chandra bowled with his polio stricken arm he was faster than a pace bowler.With almost no batting skills and a possibility of achieving the dubious distinction of taking more wickets than scoring runs in his entire career, would he be in the reckoning to make it to the national squad today ? Would he be sought after by the glitzy fashion world if he were around today ? Seems highly improbable. As opposed to the olden days when looks and appearance hardly mattered, this is just an example to show that today it is undoubtedly the survival of the fashion fittest. I imagine a Prasanna in cool denims and T.Shirts. I imagine a tall lanky Chandra or a Venkataraghavan with gel styled spiky hair and I chuckle.

The batsman, bowler and the fielder today are all rounders of the game and pin up boys of the modelling world. They are the twenty first century cricketing heroes who sign up for the 1000 CC Motorbike commercial, endorse the efficient performing gear oil and the family sedan, dance a salsa while shooting the shampoo commercial and show off a set of sparkling teeth for the toothpaste ad. As companies make a bee line for them, they are compelled to look smart. Being fashion conscious, they experiment with different kinds of hairstyles and sport them with elan.

A Vettori in glasses looks cool today. Is it possible to be bespectacled and make hearts flutter? It is possible  if the cricketer is a Vettori . What comes to my mind immediately is the wounded warrior from Gaekwad, who stood ground on that fateful day patiently even as he bled profusely. A plain looking Anshuman was often seen sporting black goggles though it never became a style statement. It's as simple as players today cashing on their fashion style to gain more popularity and make their presence felt both on and off field. Of course the opportunities available today are tremendous as compared to the good old days.

Today's cricketer works out, he has a well toned body and he likes to flaunt it. He  could be the shrewd middle order or tail end batsman with a clean shaven look, the dreaded bowler with the funky hairstyle or the discerning wicketkeeper with the long hair. Each one is an icon worth emulating for the Whatsapping and the Liking generation. He is the one who flaunts trendy goggles, classy shoes off field and is a picture of cool, calm and poise on field.Contrarily when he blows his top,as other team members rush upto him to appease and calm matters down,the scenario is any photographer's delight. The photograph of the angry young man is liked, commented upon and shared.

Billion hearts skip a beat each when he hits a ball high up in the air or spins an off break, drives a ball straight through the covers  or bowls a googly. Each and every action of his is a style statement which is as important as contributing for the team. The crowds go gaga over him when he hits the ball over the boundary for a four or a sixer. They sigh in unision when the style icon is dismissed.

The fashion savvy cricketer has to  perform and also look good on the field.With multiple sophisticated cameras installed in the stadiums, he is aware of being watched 24X7 around the globe and to be fashion conscious is indeed the need of the hour. The fans are also responsible for the metamorphosis and this explains the evolution of the cricketer from being a plain sportsperson to a fashion symbol.

Hearts flutter and fans now bleed blue, maroon, green and yellow.Traditionally he was viewed as a hero on the field. The modern day willow wielder is a superstar off field.The 21st cricketers are the most sought after icons. Over the years he has evolved from being a plain looking guy to the exuberant handsome man who has an image and a personality to maintain. He is fashion sensitive and rather than he endorsing a brand, the brand becomes synonymous with him.When he is not at the crease or running between wickets, when  he is not giving a shine to the ball on his trousers or counting his steps for the bowling run up, when he is not talking to the media, he is walking the ramp somewhere.

Ideally suited for mainstream cinema, but tied down to cricketing tournaments throughout the year, he is spotted as the face that can launch a thousands products and once in, there is no looking back. He has to look good and endorse the products he believes in. Cricketers are changing the way the world views fashion today. If  Kapil Dev's Palmolive “Da Jawab Nahin” and  Sachin's Boost “Is The Secret Of His Energy,” Kohli's The Flying Machine’s collection which has unveiled  denims, casuals, T.Shirts, cargoes, shorts and sneakers is “The New Cool.” He looks damn good today. That also explains the pressure on him to maintain his public image, how to dress dapper is always upmost in his mind and hence he has no other option but to stay updated with the latest fashion trends.

While he was wearing whites with no endorsement pressure, it was the game alone and his performance on the field that mattered. The copy book style, the perfect bowling action, the keen eye fixed on the ball in the air or the ground, the safe pair of gloves behind the wickets, the arms that hurled the ball from the covers or the deep made headlines. Not that these actions no longer assume significance but what has changed drastically is the increased reporting of the off field presence of the cricket superstars who are constantly under public glare that keeps making Fashion news.

On field, the guy with the coloured hair flexes his muscles and immediately he is on the spotlight, on the radar of commercial establishments waiting to sign him to give their products a big boost. His tattoos, mohawks and hairstyle make for important discussion topics on the social media as well as on news hours.Well ! The fans like them the way they are,different every season. Now you can't blame the players, can you ?

Conscious of being watched by National & International Fashion Houses, either during the course of the game during the day, under flood lights or off field while facing the arc lights, he knows fully well that he has created a fashion statement for  himself and a new gen of younger fans.

When teams started playing in coloured kits, that was when fashion first got added to the gentleman’s game. This innovation changed the appearance of the game, the lifestyles of the cricketers and as finances started pouring in, the commercial viability was exploited to the maximum advantage of the businesses and the players. Big businesses, sponsors, designers and fashion houses were quick to jump into the colourful format of the game. The players now sport designer wear off field and their on field jersey with logos are also specially designed by top designers or fashion houses. Now the world wants to see Greek Gods on and off field. Necessarily the players have to be fashion conscious to stay in the race.

The game has come a long way from being a five day long drawn out monotonous game to a single day faster version and recently to the shortest entertaining glamorous version which in turn has opened up the gates for a new generation of fashion crazy young fans to enter the stands, cheer and emulate their fashion conscious super cricketing heroes...and I now wonder, if, to be well groomed is a prerequisite to make it into the playing eleven......

This blog is part of Blogger Dream Team.



Friday, March 6, 2015

OM ! SHANTI OM !

Now you must understand why I keep emphasing that FB is not bad at all.It becomes imperative for us to become selective,more choosy and stay focussed.This post of mine is again for my girl friends but after reading it, I can imagine the smiles on the faces of all my brothers and uncles..Meshos,kakus,braathars,cheles,annas,thambis,mamas,chittappas....
Think ! ponder !..It is a fast world out here and everywhere..The girls are racing ahead..Well ! If you wish to atleast keep pace with them,work more and talk less....
Oooops ! I meant work more and talk less at home smile emoticon
Now ! instead of the roundabout way ,that I usually prefer , here's a direct post.
There are shortcuts to work,however difficult they may be...if only you care to stop to think.If you wish to get something done in real earnest,there should be a way.
इतनी शिदात से मैं तुम्हे पाने की कोशिश की है,
ही हर ज़ारे ने मुझे तुमसे मिलने की साज़िश की है !
कहते हैं की ......
अगर किसी चीज़ को दिल से चाहो तो पूरी कायनात उसे तुमसे मिलने की कोशिश में लग जाती है.
I remember watching a video about an easy way to remove the kernel from the coconut.The kernel was removed in its proper shape from the whole coconut..I tried it.It didn't work.So I adopted with modifications and this time it worked.
Grating a coconut is a painful job and inspite of the modern implements that one finds in the stores, the task is still arduous.
As times changed,and technology entered the large kitchens,industrial graters were put into use..I am not too informed about the extent of onslaught of technology into the kitchens/langars that cater to thousands of people.But certainly,man is always trying very hard to simplify his way of working and this I am sure everybody will agree with me..How else does one explain the availability of fresh grated coconut on the shelves ?
So before I deviate from where I was.....hmmm...I think I was mentioning about coconuts and grating.....
Anything you try for the first time is bound to be difficult.Any task attempted in an innovative way,may not have too many takers and if one wishes to do it in a particular way,one should be unmindful of any words of discouragement or ridicule..
Enter procedure without further ado..
Break the coconut.
Put it into the baffle tray under the freezer compartment of your refriegerator.
Keep it there for 24 hours.
Remove it the next day.
Take a strong screw driver.Any strong implement with a broader base at the end will be better..Say ! spade shaped should be ideal.Now I am not here to tell you where you could possibly get such an implement.I have seen a similar one at the dentists.It has a strong wooden grip fitted to a stronger metal, shaped like a small ruler.I believe dentists use it for making moulds for dentures.
Hold it at the rim of the coconut ,push it in ,and let your hand come around the rim as if you are removing the kernel,something like removing the idli from the idli plate..No ! its not that simple !.It is just an explanation so that you may get the hang of it and start showering praises on me instead of pouncing upon me..
Warning : It is not as simple as it seems,but it is not impossible either.Take care not to hurt yourself.Parental discretion is advisable 'if kids may want to try it out.
The key to success is the strong and blunt instrument that serves the purpose of a flat spatula so the kernel comes out as a whole and you will be pleased..
Depending upon the usage,you may either opt to grate the brown covering or use it as it is...

CAN YOU SEE A BIT OF CRAZY BEHIND MY SMILE :-)

I simply dote on them,they, who make me smile.
They who have not forgotten to smile ,
are the reason for my natural smile .
It's not just about how often I smile.
It is heartening to say that, then, all day I smile.
A joke gets replayed and I smile.
I see a beautiful picture and I smile.
Beholding nature in all her beauty, in sheer delight ,I smile.
I see cheerful faces and infected ,I smile.
I feel,I touch,I give a hug and I smile.
I see diamonds ,drapes and I smile.
It becomes a habit,hard to shrug off and so I smile.
Losing myself to good thoughts ,positively I smile.
I go to bed with an innocent smile.
I must be dreaming with a Piscean's smile.
So I wake up with a dreamy smile.
I look at the mirror and I grin with a toothy smile.
It reflects my emotions and another naughty smile.
Seated inside the altar , fervently I smile.
With folded hands , humbly I smile.
With eyes closed ,gratefully I smile.
I am contended and spontaneous is my smile.
I offer the cuppa with a gracious smile.
It comes back to me with a pleasing smile.
I hum with a smile.
I cook with a smile.
I look at greens and I smile.
I greet with a wide smile.
I shake hands with a smile.
I work with a small smile.
I appreciate with a generous smile.
They thank me with a smile.
I goof up,and stupidly I smile.
with tears in my eyes,I put up a smile.
I say sorry and with remorse overwhelming,I smile.
They forgive me and I smile.
I accept bouquets and I smile.
I ignore brickbats and I smile.
The impact is therapeutic,I talk about the smile.
It travels miles,Yes ! That is indeed a warm smile.
So I love people who make me smile.
Thank God for the small mercies,
Thank God for the Smile....

A WORD, A TWEET OR A PROVERB CAN TELL A FUNNY STORY !

Now does it really matter that Mala ended up without getting any prize on that day? "Participation is more important ," saying, she consoled herself and at the end of the day, it was yet again, time to reflect upon her strengths and weaknesses.

It was the beginning of Women's day celebration at work.The celebrations were kicked off with a series of competitions.The auditorium on the seventh floor was not packed to capacity. It was an all woman gathering and needless to say , the ambience was simply divine.Thirty, all women teams of two members each were participating in the competitions.

The first event was to solve three jigsaw puzzles of 25 pieces each in 5 minutes.To work on one puzzle together at a time and to move on, to the next one only on completion was the condition. The team put in place two puzzles and 5 pieces of the third one. A point system was followed to evaluate the score. The team comprising of Mala and Rama were awarded 25 + 25 + 5 = 55 points.The top scores in the event were 61,59, 57,and 55.

Here one should clearly understand the importance of staying calm while working in a pressure situation.Panic can mar performance and it is absolutely imperative to stay cool headed, shut one's ears to any external sound, including the ring of the bell that indicates the Start and the Stop and lend a deaf ear to any prompts in between, that keeps one informed of the time remaining.

Just remember that while staying focussed, with the mind concentrating on just the completion, speed is gained naturally. It is when, one gets diverted or tends to panic that pieces begin to fall out of place.This is exactly what happened when the Mala-Rama team began to work on the third puzzle with one minute remaining. As Mala brought relevant pieces together, Rama was separating them.They could have completed the third one and romped home victorious.Or did they lack the killer instinct? It was certainly not their day.


The next event was "What's the good word ?"



Find the word in one minute with three clues, all one words was the condition It was Rama's turn to pick up a chit.


She opened the chit with much enthusiasm.It read "Receipt".


Her first clue to her partner was " Payment"



Mala said " Salary,"


She posed the second clue " Acknowledgement,"

Mala said " Receipt."


Bingo it was done in just two clues.



Their score jumped to 55 + 25


"What's the proverb?" was the next.



This was a Dumb Charade round.To find out the the proverb in one minute was the condition .

Rama continued to be on the posing clues end. Mala stayed on at the answering end. Mala was fantastic with her responses and Rama was simply amazed at her partner's razor sharp memory.The much needed answer was still eluding Mala and a visbly upset Rama tried her best to motivate Mala.

Maybe Rama was not aptly expressive enough to explain to her partner the proverb "A Penny saved is a penny earned " though she did try her best to emote well. In a half packed auditorium, not realising that she was acting dumb, Rama was performing a solo mime show, much to the amusement of the audience.

Mala did understand that the proverb contained the word "penny." She was quick to grasp, build upon it and started firing proverbs one after another. She said "Penny Wise Pound Foolish," "A penny in Time is as good as a dollar," "In for a Penny in for a pound," Penny for your thoughts," "cost a pretty penny ," "be ten a penny," ...........and the hall was reverberating with laughter .

As a helpless actor exclaimed in sheer frustration, showed signs of despair,expressed her desperation with random hand movements, a mute Rama was signalling to Mala in all possible ways. She made an effort to show that she saved and she earned. She made the picture of a piggy bank in thin air, formed a line with two volunteers, stood in the make believe queue, pushed a hand into what she wanted Mala to believe was the cash counter of a bank and collected the cash. Rama counted invisible paper money, she waved , she showed her partner that she felt on top on the world but alas all to no avail...


The proverb sealed their fate and the score of the Mala-Rama team stayed at


" 55 + 25 "


On an otherwise warm and sultry day,the break was welcome for the cool headed women employees. It was an enjoyable afternoon inside a freezing cold auditorium. The atmosphere was electric and hilarious .Some teams had opted for Thamizh. The expressions were simply priceless ,especially " Kaiyukku etinadhu vaayukku yettalai" when the actor jumped ,skipped with her arms stretched out, bending alternatingly ,with fingers close to the face but away from the mouth and finally waving her hands together in criss cross fashion to show the inability of the hand to reach the mouth. In a sides splitting scenario, the audience went hysterical as someone in the audience commented rather loudly....This is certainly a case of


" Hand in Mouth ".

Monday, March 2, 2015

SHAMITABH A REVIEW !

Pura naam Amitabh Bachchan !
Baap ka naam Harivansh Rai Bachchan !
Ma ka naam,Teji bachchan !
Shaher Mumbai !
Umar Bahathar saal......


But for the wall that keeps prodding me to write, I would have found that bit of solace in silence.Thank your stars that none of you can hear me.

That sums it up.Our hero Daanish played by Danush is mute and dreams of becoming a superstar.


He travels from Ikatpuri to Mumbai with a trunk box and a Pan Parag tin, containing some cash which a poverty stricken mother had left behind for her son on her deathbed.

Daanish enters the Filmcity and hides in a vanity van.The movie is about super stardom,a true reflection of the state of Bollywood,how a billion hearts beat and only a few make it,the struggle for the No 1 position, the fear of a fall and the connected emotions of greed,selfishness,jealousy and ego.

This is the 21st century and a futuristic world out there.We are made to believe that , if mainstream cinema says so , it must be true , if not now maybe some day
 smile emoticon
Brace yourself to , also believe that , a pretty assistant director attired in black ,who dreams of making her own movie some day with the mute actor as the hero, is compassionate enough to help a stranger,a struggling newcomer who does not have a voice of his own.

She stands like a rock behind him,gives him the much needed support to aim for the stars and gets him a chance to work as a hero with a renowned director.

If all this stupidity was not enough,the casual telephone chat between a physician and his friend an Otolaryngologist had me totally flabbergasted.Anyway,on the advice of the friend ,Daanish is packed off to Finland for the latest voicemaker implant .This is a recent marvel in the field of layringitis and Daanish is a recepient of the power of vocal chords.The donor has a baritone and has to coexist with the recepient.

Daanish and the debutant assistant director played by Akshara Haasan meet a drunkard who growls within the confines of the cemetery walls.The contract is signed and the protaganist says that his voice which sounds good even from the mouth of a dog had been rejected earlier when he had aspired to make it big in tinseldom.

The lighter moments in the film come in the scenes where Big B is at his expressive humorous best.He lends his voice much to the irritation of Daanish whose lip movements fail to sync with the baritone.In these scenes,Daanish manages to emote his helplessness quite well.

The second half is utterly disappointing and one gets to realise that Balki is also confused.Not knowing how to build upon his brilliant idea,clueless on where to take whom,he throws in the towel ,and the movie goes wayward.One thing this movie will be remembered for is the style and the sophistication that Big B exudes.He is formidable and carries the entire movie on his acting and voice alone.

Rejected in his early days for his unconventional looks, old,wrinkled and haggard looking ,smothered in mud and dirt he is still a class apart.It was a night show that I was watching and the saving grace was the growl of the baritone,but for which the sound of snores would have been echoing within the hall...............